| Dan Lee

7 Questions with (Not) Paul Utesch from Public Enemy

Savage is on a mission to highlight players from our sponsored teams across multiple sports. Catch this and other "7 Questions from Savage" as we take you into the (usually actual) minds of athletes around the world! Today we imagine what Paul Utesch might've said as our schedules never aligned as he aided hurricane relief efforts then prepared for USAU Club Nationals with Public Enemy out of Texas. 

Paul, captain of Public Enemy, has been an avid supporter of radically fun jersey designs for his team, which have been featured on SAVAGE Team Marketplace for the past 2 National tournaments. Check out this year's rendition alongside other Nationals contenders' collections on sale during the tournament. Use code CLUBNATTIES2017 to receive 15% off Public EnemyDC Scandal, Shame., and Boston Dig collections! Congrats to all of our athletes! 

Now onto imaginary Paul...the picture is real though. 

VII: It's pretty evident that you love having a really, really good time. Can you tell the people what your idea of the best time is? 

NPU (Not Paul Utesch): Let me answer your question with another question. Have you ever ridden an ostrich naked through Central Park? You're naked, not the ostrich. The ostrich is wearing a bowtie. You see, not only is the ostrich one swift beast, which makes for a wild ride. It's pretty much as close as you can get to riding a dinosaur. You could try a 'gator, but you'd probably lose. 

VII: What's your favorite Disney Movie?

NPU: There's a picture of me with a baby Simba floating in the internet ether, so you might imagine I'd say The Lion King. Alas, "Let it gooooo. Let it goooo...." Boom. 

VII: (found that picture). That's beautiful, Paul. So many talents. Do you have any other hidden talents? 

NPU: I never hide my talents. But, here are a couple of things I'm really good at. Eating potato chips, matching my socks to my ties, and limericks. 

VII: Let's talk Ultimate and jersey design. You came at us with a need for Paula Deen. Can you explain the inspiration?

NPU: Does this really need explaining? She's hot, she's buttery, she loves ham. It's not like I have a thing for older, southern women. I don't; at least not yet, if your name's not Paula Deen. Paula, call me. 

VII: A couple of this year's designs featured Big Tex. I know it was a catastrophic moment for all of Texas. Utter heartbreak. What did it mean to you to see Big Tex ablaze? 

NPU: Like you said, utter heartbreak. Big Tex wasn't just an iconic animatronic statue that held the hearts of all Texans. He was literally my friend. We used to play basketball together. What a monster on offense, although his defense left a bit to be desired. He just stood there waving at the rest of us. Him catching spontaneous fire is truly symbolic of the way he got burned on the courts. We'll miss your super-crappy defense and goofy/creepy smile, Tex. 

VII: Preparing for nationals, what's that like? Do you have a routine? 

NPU: I have a very specific routine: I visualize the win. The brain is the biggest muscle in the body. Is that true? It is for me. 

VII: You're from Dallas, home of the AUDL Dallas Roughnecks. Think you could beat them? 

NPU: Ha! At croquet, yes. At flip-cup, yes. At boardgames, yes. At mixed ultimate, undoubtedly